3/28/2011

It's like Nerdvana

Leonard: I just assumed. Who sells a full-sized time machine for $800?
Sheldon: In a vent diagram that would be an individual located within the intersection of the sets 'no longer want my time machine' and 'need $800'

Raj: Congratulations, you're the proud owner of a miniature time machine.
Howard: You lucky duck.

Leonard: Come on, guys, push!
Sheldon: If I push any harder I'm gonna give birth to my colon.

Howard: Talk about your chick magnets.
Raj: Oh yeah. The guy who lives next to me is always like, I've a jacuzzi on my balcony, I've a jacuzzi on my balcony. But wait until I tell him, I've got a time machine on my balcony. Stuff that in your speedos, Jacuzzi Bob!

Sheldon: I propose that we add pants must be worn at all times in the time machine.
Leonard: Seconded.
Howard: I was going to put down a towel.

Sheldon: Are you upset about something?
Leonard: What was your first clue?
Sheldon: Well there was a number of things. First the late hour, then you demeanors seems very low energy plus your irritability...
Leonard: Yes I'm upset!
Sheldon: Oh... I don't usually pick up on those things. Good for me.
Leonard: Yeah good for you.
Sheldon: (walks away and then turns back) Oh, wait. Did you want to talk about what's bothering you?
Leonard: I don't know... maybe.
Sheldon: Wow! I'm on fire tonight.

Sheldon: What are you doing?
Leonard: I'm packing up all my collectibles and taking them down to the comic book store to sell.
Sheldon: Well is that really necessary. If you need money you can always sell blood. And semen.

Howard: Mom, my bar-mizvah bonds, how much do I got? Thanks. I can go twenty six houndred dollars and two trees in Israel.

Sheldon: You hypocrite!
Penny: What?
Sheldon: Little Miss "grown up don't play with toys". If I were to go into that apartment right now, would I find Beanie Babies? Are you not an accumulator of Care Bears and My Little Ponies? And who is that Japanies feline I see frolicking on your shorts? Hello, Hello Kitts!

Penny: It is the things you love that make you who you are.
Howard: I guess that makes me large breasts.

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