Sheldon: Today, it’s a Chinese food retrieval robot. Tomorrow, it travels back in time and tries to kill Sarah Connor.
Leonard: I don’t think that’s going to happen, Sheldon.
Sheldon: No one ever does. That’s why it happens.
Howard: Raj and I entered Sheldon’s information on a dating site, and it spit out Amy Farrah Fowler.
Penny: Oh, my God! Sheldon and Amy.
Howard: Or, as we call them, Shamy.
Penny: Shamy. I am so digging the Shamy
Sheldon: I am aware of the way humans usually reproduce which is messy, unsanitary and based on living next to you for three years, involves loud and unnecessary appeals to a deity.
Penny: Oh, God.
Sheldon: Yes, exactly.
Sheldon: I decided to take your advice and have arranged to go on a date with Amy Farrah Fowler.
Penny: Oh, that's great! Have fun.
Sheldon: Wait! You have to drive me.
Penny: What?!
Sheldon: You know I don't drive.
Penny: Well, go ask Leonard!
Sheldon: I did; he said, and I quote: "Ask Penny, it was her cockamamie idea."
Penny: Leonard said "cockamamie"?
Sheldon: Actually, I'm paraphrasing. Having been raised in a Christian household, I'm uncomfortable with the language he used. And to be honest, I'm not entirely comfortable with "cockamamie".
Penny: Can I ask you a question?
Sheldon: Given your community-college education, I encourage you to ask me as many as possible.
Sheldon: I have a Masters degree and two Doctorates. The things I 'should' know, I do know.
Penny: Uncomfortable silence it is.
Rajesh: You know there's something I've always wondered about Aquaman
Leonard: Yeah?
Rajesh: Where does he poop?
Leonard: What?
Rajesh: What do the toilet look like in Atlantis? How would you flush it? And when you did flush it, where would the poop go?
Raj: You slipped and fell into a robotic hand..
Wolowitz: Yes.
Raj: Penis first?
Wolowitz: Yes.
Leonard: I'd suggest using some lubricant, but I have a feeling you fell on that as well.
Howard: Not funny, Leonard!
Raj: Oh, come on, dude. A robot hand's got a death grip on your junk. It's funny, ask anyone.
Raj: When Winnie the Pooh got his head stuck in the honey tree, his friends all graped onto him and pull and pull.
Leonard: You do what you want, I'm not touching another man's honey tree.
Leonard: Do you have any ideas, Raj?
Raj: Right now all I can think about is cookies and Hawaiian Punch.
Nurse: What is this?
Howard: It's a robot arm.
Nurse: Where's the rest of the robot?
Howard: I only built the arm.
Nurse: Because that's all you needed, right?
Sheldon: Using in vitro fertilization and a surrogate uterus to gift humanity with our progeny.
Penny: You’re still on that?
Sheldon: In these uncertain times, doesn’t humanity deserve a gift?
Sheldon: You could still go out and look for number 32.
Leonard: I don’t think that’s going to happen, Sheldon.
Sheldon: No one ever does. That’s why it happens.
Howard: Raj and I entered Sheldon’s information on a dating site, and it spit out Amy Farrah Fowler.
Penny: Oh, my God! Sheldon and Amy.
Howard: Or, as we call them, Shamy.
Penny: Shamy. I am so digging the Shamy
Sheldon: I am aware of the way humans usually reproduce which is messy, unsanitary and based on living next to you for three years, involves loud and unnecessary appeals to a deity.
Penny: Oh, God.
Sheldon: Yes, exactly.
Sheldon: I decided to take your advice and have arranged to go on a date with Amy Farrah Fowler.
Penny: Oh, that's great! Have fun.
Sheldon: Wait! You have to drive me.
Penny: What?!
Sheldon: You know I don't drive.
Penny: Well, go ask Leonard!
Sheldon: I did; he said, and I quote: "Ask Penny, it was her cockamamie idea."
Penny: Leonard said "cockamamie"?
Sheldon: Actually, I'm paraphrasing. Having been raised in a Christian household, I'm uncomfortable with the language he used. And to be honest, I'm not entirely comfortable with "cockamamie".
Penny: Can I ask you a question?
Sheldon: Given your community-college education, I encourage you to ask me as many as possible.
Sheldon: I have a Masters degree and two Doctorates. The things I 'should' know, I do know.
Penny: Uncomfortable silence it is.
Rajesh: You know there's something I've always wondered about Aquaman
Leonard: Yeah?
Rajesh: Where does he poop?
Leonard: What?
Rajesh: What do the toilet look like in Atlantis? How would you flush it? And when you did flush it, where would the poop go?
Raj: You slipped and fell into a robotic hand..
Wolowitz: Yes.
Raj: Penis first?
Wolowitz: Yes.
Leonard: I'd suggest using some lubricant, but I have a feeling you fell on that as well.
Howard: Not funny, Leonard!
Raj: Oh, come on, dude. A robot hand's got a death grip on your junk. It's funny, ask anyone.
Raj: When Winnie the Pooh got his head stuck in the honey tree, his friends all graped onto him and pull and pull.
Leonard: You do what you want, I'm not touching another man's honey tree.
Leonard: Do you have any ideas, Raj?
Raj: Right now all I can think about is cookies and Hawaiian Punch.
Nurse: What is this?
Howard: It's a robot arm.
Nurse: Where's the rest of the robot?
Howard: I only built the arm.
Nurse: Because that's all you needed, right?
Sheldon: Using in vitro fertilization and a surrogate uterus to gift humanity with our progeny.
Penny: You’re still on that?
Sheldon: In these uncertain times, doesn’t humanity deserve a gift?
Sheldon: You could still go out and look for number 32.
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