junk jiggling

Sheldon: I miss the old days when your romantic partners could be returned to the video store. Howard: When you say making it work, does that include doing the cyber nasty? Leonard: What? Howard: You know, the virtual pickle tickle. The digital bow-chicka-bow-bow. Howard: you’re gonna lose Priya to some fancy guy in a turban who grew up with Kama Sutra coloring books. Sheldon: And now they’re cavorting at the base of my hair follicles like dancing hippies at the Redwood National Forest. Leonard: Sheldon, you do this all the time. You fixate on some crazy idea and then blow it way out of proportion. Sheldon: Name one time I’ve ever done that. Leonard: How about when you put GPS trackers in your garbage because you were convinced North Korean spies were stealing your doodles? The chicken nuggets you were sure were human nuggets. The strangely-shaped cloud that was following you around town. The time you put on my shirt by mistake and were convinced you’d started growing again. Sheldon: I said, name one. You really need to work on your listening skills. Penny: Why don’t you just admit you overreacted? Sheldon: No, thank you. Leonard: It’s like living with a Chihuahua. Penny: What’s up, buttercup? What’s the word, hummingbird? What’s the gist, physicist? Leonard: TTa-da! Man nipples. Sheldon: If your video’s frozen, try resetting the TCP/IP stack. Leonard: Oh! I didn’t even think of that. Thanks. Sheldon: You’re welcome. Please let me know when you and your girlfriend are done hogging the bandwidth for your self-abuse. I’m trying to stream a movie on Netflix in here. Amy: Best friends, besties, BFFs, peas in a pod, sisters who would share travelling pants. Amy: Kiss me where I’ve never been kissed before. Sheldon: You mean like Salt Lake City? Amy: Everything except bra and panties. And they’re a leopard-spotted secret I share with Victoria.

Let’s put on our thinking cap, shall we?

Sheldon: It’s not what it looks like. Leonard: They slept together, Sherlock. Leonard: Please. Sheldon would have been before you, and he might not even have genitals. Howard: You’re not in love with Penny. Raj: Yes, I am. The god Kamadeva has shot us with his flowery arrows of love. Howard: Who? Raj: He’s the Hindu version of Cupid, but way better, because he rides a giant parrot. Leonard: Raj, come on. You fall in love with any girl who smiles at you. Sheldon: For the record, I do have genitals. They’re functional and aesthetically pleasing. Penny: You heard what I did? Amy: Well, I heard who you did. Penny: Dr. Jekyll and Mrs. Whore. Amy: I’m sure your reputation can survive you shagging a little Indian boy. Bernadette: You jerk face! Raj: Do you think I have a shot with Penny? Bernadette: Of course you do. You’re a cutie pie. Any girl would be lucky to have you. Amy: We’ll make popcorn, stay up all night and I’ll teach you my secret language, Op. Leonard: Excuse me. You’re a world-renowned expert in parenting and child development, and all you’ve got is buck up? Leonrad's mother: Sorry. Buck up, sissy pants. Amy: For the first time ever, I have a thriving social life. And no pressure, but it kind of lives and dies with you. Raj: You can’t ruin a friendship with sex. That’s like trying to ruin ice cream with chocolate sprinkles. Raj: Can I say it fell apart because you were all, I want to have your babies, and I was like, I’m too rock and roll to be tied down? Penny: No. Sheldon: Geology isn’t a real science! Raj: We’ve decided to let our crazy, wonderful night together be just one of those memories you have and can call to mind when you’re feeling blue or you’re in the shower. Penny: Hey, what you doing, Quick Draw?

Commence operation “Priya Wouldn’t Wanna Be-ya.”

Bernadette: Some women don’t like to get chummy when their panties are down. Amy: You okay in there, bestie? Penny: I’m fine. Amy: The reason I ask is that many people experience bladder shyness, the inability to pass urine Penny: Yeah, I said I’m fine. Stop talking to me. Amy: She always this crabby when she urinates? Bernadette: We’re really not that close. Penny: And I certainly don’t have a problem with Leonard’s new girlfriend who wears way too much makeup. Penny: Ooh, these are cute. Of course if I buy them, I'll have to rent my womb out to a gay couple. Bernadette: I don’t know. I’m not a very good liar. They kind of whup that out of you in Catholic school. Amy: Don’t worry. I’ll teach you. I did two years of Cub Scouts before they found out I was a girl. Amy: How do you feel about concealing a recording device in the cleavage of your ample bosom? Bernadette: I don’t want anything in my ample bosom. Amy: Come on, Strawberries. Take one for the team. Sheldon: I also invented two new chess pieces. The serpent, and the old woman. Sheldon: I must say, ever since you started having regular intercourse, your mind has lost its keen edge. You should reflect on that. Leonard: Excuse me, but Einstein had a pretty busy sex life. Sheldon: Yes, and he never unified gravity with the other forces. If he hadn’t been such a hound dog, we’d all have time machines. Leonard: Got it. Bye. Amy: Did you know that women wear high heels to make the buttocks and breasts more prominent? Raj: The lonely guy and the two happy couples? I’d rather get a prostate exam from a leper who walks away with nine fingers. Priya: Oh, would you please stop feeling sorry for yourself? Raj: I have to feel sorry for myself. I’m the only one who cares. Just like I’m the only one who’ll have sex with me. Penny: Once these puppies touch the ground they’re mine, and I’ll have to wear them walking up and down Hollywood Boulevard in order to pay them off. Raj: I need a hug. Sheldon: Sorry, I have company. Raj: Nothing rhymes with orange. It's probably lonely. Sheldon: You look positively orange with loneliness. No, I don’t see that catching on at all. Sheldon: My recommendation is that you gobble these up like Tic Tacs. Bernadette: yeah, it’s hysterical. Raj: forgive me for staring, but you’re very beautiful. Sheldon: they sound delicious, but this money is earmarked for scones. Raj: She didn't even get to see my penis. Ta-da! Howard: Nice to see that the gals are getting along. Leonard: Gals? Who are you, Fred Flintstone?

You really are a mean little man.

Bernadette: if she orders something low-fat I’ll totally give her the full-fat version. Leonard: My water. You’re drinking it. Sheldon: Dear Lord! Have you been drinking it? Leonard: Yes. It’s my water. Sheldon: Well, that’s it then. I’m dead. Sheldon: 'He drank from Leonard`s glass' - the words they will be carving into my tombstone. Sheldon: Gang way! Dead man walking! Sheldon: thank you for asking. I love you so much! Sheldon: Fire demon. Raj: Ooh, fire demon. Sheldon’s turning up the heat. Howard: Troll master. Raj: Check it! Howard pulls one out from under the bridge. Nice! Leonard: Water nymph. Raj: Oh, yeah, she’s got puddles in all the right places. Sheldon: Could you please play the game without commenting on every card? Raj: Sorry. Walking tree. Sheldon: Last one. Raj: I’m taking a stroll and I’m sporting wood. Howard: Have you told your parents you're dating this short glass of skim milk? Penny: Oh you're going to jibber jabber about jibber jabber! Sheldon: I’ll sit over there, it looks cleaner. Leonard: Does your family have a history of heart disease? Howard: My family is the history of heart disease. There's a cave painting in France of one of my ancestors doing this. Priya: What happened? Bernadette: Howard's mother had a heart attack because I have sex with him and she can't. Sheldon: I’ll give you $1,000 if you’ll drive me home. Leonard: I'm the king of foreplay. Howard: it’s the circle of life, sweetie. One day our son will marry someone and it will kill you. Bernadette: You're a putz! Do you what that means? Howard: Yeah. Do you? Raj: I got a colossal serpent right here. Raj: Rotting Zombie ... Sheldon's new Facebook picture! Sheldon: Zandor, wizard of the north. Ha! I win! Howard: If you skip the part about under a two week quarantine because you were exposed to a deadly disease, ABSOLUTELY!

one year older

ojoj 21. kom så ska vi leva.

nya äventyr. nya upplevelser. nya utmaningar. nya discon.
nytt helt enkelt!

röda vinbär och kalvtungor

kalvfödsel hos moster. själv spenderade jag tid i ladan med de andra korna och tror jag hittade en favorit faktiskt. nr 502 och jag fick fin kontakt och han tycke nog om mig också.

sen blev det sagogryn (hur ljuvligt låter inte det) och hundratals bär.

fisknät eller potter

Idag vill jag:

segla iväg i en liten båt på nya äventyr.
sitta vid en gammal brygga med ett hemgjort fiskespö med en fin vän vid min sida.
sola på en varm strand med en söt kärleksbok.
eller varför inte
chilla på ett hustak med en drink i handen.

sommaren lever ännu i själen.

the3L

live
laugh
love

Mala aka Malin

min systerdotter är min skatt. min skrutt.
hon hälsar en med ett stort varmt leende och med armarna utsträckta redo för en stor kram.

hon e så lik syster, lika girly som mamma. oja.

avgift

inget mysigt ord. för bara med sig tråkigheter.

nu är mitt konto 106eg magrare. suck.